Land of Oz

The Merry Old Land of Oz

The Merry Old Land of Oz

After a very early flight I arrived into Melbourne, Australia, and made my way from the plane to the queue for Immigration, getting my visa and passport ready. It had been the first country I had been to on my travels that required a visa. Admittedly it had been really simple (and free) to obtain – a quick online form and a response with my visa emailed back to me in under 48 hours. I read through the visa email, which had a couple of entry conditions on it. I wasn’t allowed to work, I had to be free from TB and I would not be allowed in if I had a criminal conviction where I had been sentenced for a period of 12 months or more. I pondered the irony of the last restriction given that the British once used Australia as the world’s largest prison and that a proportion of the population must be able to trace their roots back to a convict sent over from Britain. It is a subject I have discussed with Australian friends of mine, and one that they all seem to get quite touchy about (they are all quick to point out that they are not descended from criminals). I think Australians should be proud of that heritage. After all, the Brits sent the convicts to a place with lovely beaches, a nice sunny climate and a great outdoor way of life just because they stole a loaf of bread. I think the convicts (or at least their descendants) really had the last laugh there.

After clearing Immigration I boarded a bus in to Melbourne. My next host Dale had said that he would be able to pop out of work mid-morning to have a coffee, give me keys to his place and give me directions. We met up at Southern Cross station and headed to a nearby coffee shop. Because of the early flight and the time difference I had already been up eight hours despite it only being 10am and I was in need of caffeine (or gin, but I thought it best to stick to coffee). Dale was a great example of how news of my trip had been passed on, with one gay host leading to another. Dale was a friend of Gary (Gay #23) who had been one of my hosts in Texas back in October. Gary had offered to put me up after a cousin of Rhett’s (Gay #14) in Nashville had sent my details on to Gary having seen Rhett post something about my stay and a link to my website. Rhett had offered to be a host after Greg (Gay #1) had emailed his friends about my trip before I had left back in June and one of them had suggested Rhett. I was definitely a big gay baton, being passed on from one host to the next.

Over coffee Dale explained how to get to the tram stop I needed, what tram to catch and how to get to his place from the tram. He had drawn me a map with the route from the tram stop to his place marked on it as well as highlighting a number of the local amenities on nearby streets. He handed me a set of keys and I was soon on my way while Dale headed back to work. I followed the map to his, eventually finding his building and letting myself in. I was confronted with six flats and looked at the instructions Dale had written for me. He had put his address in one corner of the map but had not put the flat number. I searched for the mailboxes or a doorbell that might have a name on it but to no avail. I sent a text to Dale asking which flat was his. I thought about systematically trying the keys in the doors just to see which they opened but I could hear the noise of a television and a toddler coming from the first flat. I didn’t fancy being confronted by an irate Australian asking why I was trying to break in to their place. Luckily I didn’t have to wait too long for a response from Dale and I was soon settled in.

As it was close to lunchtime I used the map to navigate to the nearest store where I picked up food, heading back to Dale’s to eat. I had a post lunch snooze, waking when I heard Dale returning from work. I felt much better for the nap and after a shower and change of clothes I was ready to head out with Dale for some dinner. We made our way to Chapel Street, chatting as we walked up. Dale pointed out a couple of good drinking places before we settled on a Mexican place for dinner. It was a warm evening so once we had our food and beers we found a spot at one of the tables outside on the street. It provided a great place to people watch from and I had to apologise once or twice for stopping mid sentence as my attention was drawn to someone walking by (sometimes because they were very fit, sometimes because they were very badly dressed).

Dale, as an American, was on my list of “non-local locals” who I had stayed with. The list included English hosts in NYC, Washington, Boston, Manzanillo & Whitianga, a Canadian in NYC, a Northern Irish host in Toronto and Bob, who is multi-national, in Chicago. I asked him how he was finding Australia as he had only recently moved over. He told me he was settling in nicely, starting to make some local friends and loved the area he lived in. I had told a friend of mine (another gay called Dale) where I would be staying when I got to Melbourne. He told me that the area is very popular with you young twink hipster gays and asked if I was staying with a 20 year-old. I replied that the photos I had seen of him on Facebook I was guessing he was a ways past 20. Over dinner Dale gave me a couple of suggestions of things to see and do. He had left me out a guidebook for Melbourne which I had had a leaf through early in the day. It was an American brand so it didn’t have any reference to Ramsay Street in it but it looked like it would be useful for my stay. We got on really well over dinner. Dale had a good sense of humour (for an American) and it was another case of feeling instantly comfortable chatting with someone (at least for me, Dale may disagree).

When I got up the following morning Dale had already left for work. I got ready and headed out, making my way back to Chapel Street. The first thing on my to do list was to see if I could get a local pay as you go sim card so I would be back in the land of mobile data users. I had missed being connected going round New Zealand. Being able to read my friends’ status updates while I was out for the day made me feel a little less far away from everyone. I found a Telstra store and headed in, walking up to the counter at the back. I was asked my name and the nature of my query so I explained it all to the man. He made some notes and told me to wait for someone who would be able to help me. When I finally got served I explained my query once more to the guy serving me. He took my phone, put a sim card in, tapped a few things into his computer and told me it was all set up. It didn’t take very long at all. I was ready to go explore the land of Oz.

“The Merry Old Land of Oz” 
Lyrics from The Merry Old Land of Oz from the musical The Wizard of Oz