Something has changed

Something has changed within me

Something has changed within me

I woke the next morning to find myself on a half-deflated airbed. Either I hadn’t blown it up enough while tipsy the previous night or it had been leaking air in the night. I contemplated trying to snooze for a while but could feel something sticking in me (not like that), something under the airbed, and it made it difficult to get comfortable. I finally got up, lifting the airbed to see one of my trainers underneath. Not quite the Princess and the Pea but not far off. Damian was up and headed off to work so I took myself in to town in search of an internet connection and some coffee. I found a coffee shop and settled myself in to a corner table with a late breakfast. I had a few friend requests from the people at the party the previous day, including one from the cute guy. I sent him a message saying it had been nice meeting him and that I hoped to see him again before I left Melbourne. As I was online booking a couple of trips for when I got to Uluru a friend of mine popped up on Skype so we had a bit of a catch up.

My friend told me I looked a little tired (I think his exact words were “F**k you look rough”) and I explained that it was the morning after Australia Day. They asked me how the celebrations had been and I filled them in on the party I had been to and the people I had met. My friend said it sounded like a soap opera storyline, although people would think it too unrealistic. Our conversation got me thinking, something which I hadn’t done too much of on my trip. I had been so busy seeing the sights, meeting people and having fun that I hadn’t had a chance to take a step back and take note of how I had changed. Before I set off travelling I had only ever met one transgender person before. I would have been nervous about meeting trans women but mainly because I would be worried about saying something stupid or finding myself staring at them without realising. By the time I had been travelling for nearly 8 months I was a lot more relaxed in myself and meeting new people was something I had got a lot better at. My travels have made me realise that, whatever differences people have and everyone has them – nobody is “normal”, that the only important thing is "Are they a nice person?" I struggled to think of anyone I had met on my trip who wasn’t a nice person.

With my breakfast all finished I took myself for a wander round the Museum of Melbourne for a couple of hours before I headed to meet up with Leo for a coffee. He was a friend of Gary, my Texas host, and he and his husband had offered to host me if any of my Melbourne gays fell through. I hadn’t needed to take them up on the offer but wanted to meet them so I could at least say thanks in person. Craig was out of town with work so it was just the two of us. We headed to a place with some outdoor seating, thankfully in the shade. My good intentions of having coffee went out the window when I saw the woman on the next table sipping a refreshing looking cider with plenty of ice. I figured in the heat I needed to rehydrate and with all the apples in the cider it must be one of my five a day. We had a good chat over a couple of drinks before I headed off to freshen up before a Friday night out on the town.

Evening plans started with a little more drinking. A bunch of people from the previous day’s celebrations had arranged to meet for drinks at the Arts Centre so I made my way to join them. It was a warm evening and everyone was outside so after getting a drink I headed outside to join them. I said hello to the people who I had met and was introduced to a couple of other people I had not met before. I felt like I was a bona fide member of their circle of friends and felt like I had known them a lot longer than two days. After a couple of drinks at the Arts Centre we jumped into a couple of cabs, with about as much efficiency as the previous day, and headed to a Vietnamese restaurant called Thanh Nga Nine. It was a regular haunt for the gang and I got the impression that Samm and Karen were frequent diners. Samm called them and managed to get a table for 12 on a Friday night with an hours notice.

Our taxi had arrived first so we settled in at the table while a couple of people went to the bottle shop for some provisions. I spent about 10 minutes looking at the menu without actually reading it. With people arriving, chatting, heading to the bottle shop and swapping seats around nobody was really paying much attention to the menu. It had the potential for taking forever to get our order sorted. Thankfully Samm took charge. After having checked that there were no vegetarians in the group she ordered for us, assuring us that everything was delicious and there would be enough to go round. It made it so much easier and I was grateful that the decision was out of my hands. She was right too, the food was amazing and there was more than enough to go round.

Over dinner I chatted with Samm, Karen and Damian about places that I thought I could live. None of them were native Australians and they gave me their experiences of moving across the world. Having been in Australia for just over a month I had come to the conclusion that I didn’t think I would be able to live Down Under. Melbourne was a great city and I think I preferred it to Sydney but I couldn’t see myself living there. I had enjoyed the places I had visited and the people I had met but Australia felt a little bit small (despite it being a huge country) and isolated. I wasn’t sure I wanted to run the risk of picking up an Australian accent either and having everything I said sounding like a question. 

We followed dinner with a little bit of a tour of the Melbourne gay scene. We started in DT’s and I came to the conclusion that it was actually a second home for most of the gang. We got drinks and stood chatting, minding our own business when some random drunk guy came over to where we were standing and started to dance about. Karen very politely danced with him for a little while. I was just relived that for once the nutter hadn’t made a beeline for me. The dancing came to an abrupt end when the man fell over. He made a half-hearted attempt to turn his tumble onto the floor into a dance move but gave it up as a bad job. Karen shrugged her shoulders and carried on dancing. After DT’s we went to The Laird where the other clientele made me feel relatively young and in shape. I was even out-bearded by the majority of the other people in there. Our final stop of the evening was the Peel. It was a massive club and had a younger crowd. I probably made them feel relatively young and in shape. We partied until about 3am and then headed home. I checked under the airbed for shoes and hit the sack.

“Something has changed within me” 
Lyrics from Defying Gravity from the musical Wicked